Parents often face difficulties when trying to gain cooperation from their children, regardless of age. From toddlers resisting bedtime to teenagers refusing tasks, the question arises: "Can’t they just cooperate with me a little?" A proposed solution is implementing routines, which can help structure and organize daily activities and alleviate these issues.
A routine involves organizing tasks in a set way. In a home, routines could encompass bedtime activities, school preparation, and regular meal times. Parents or caregivers typically set these routines, often involving the entire family, to bring order and predictability, thereby easing everyday life pressures and fostering good behaviors.
"Routines can help make our kids’ lives more predictable," leading to fewer power struggles during daily tasks such as mornings and bedtimes. It often results in families feeling more connected and less stressed. Research supports the notion that routines positively impact children’s cooperation and reduce conflict, fostering a closer relationship with parents and caregivers.
Another significant benefit of routines is their impact on children's development and mental health. They can help prevent power struggles over daily tasks and contribute to family harmony. Routines encourage independence, an important life skill, while positively influencing children's physical and mental well-being.
Establishing effective routines requires consistency. Repeating the same steps daily helps children feel secure and creates a predictable environment. While it can take up to three weeks for children to adapt, the effort is often worthwhile.
Limits set during routines should be clear and positive, suiting each child's needs and family circumstances. Clear and customized instructions enhance understanding, whether given verbally, through visual schedules, or written lists. Supporting children according to their abilities is crucial—young children may need help settling at night, while older children might require guidance on screen time boundaries.
Encouraging adherence to routines with praise can reinforce positive behavior. For example, thanking a toddler for following a bedtime routine and rewarding them with a favored breakfast the next day can be effective. For more strategies, Triple P Online offers resources for parents with children under 12, new parents, and teenagers.
References for these strategies include work by Ren and Fan (2019) highlighting routine's impact on parent-child relationships and Selman and Dilworth-Bart's (2024) review on routines and child development.
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